Goodbye from the Queen

Dec 18, 2015

It is the greatest honor to watch a human being take her first breath and her last. While in no way is Yoga Flirt a human being I have been tasked with the greatest gift of bringing this creation into the world. And now I am witnessing it fade away. In the brilliant words of Dr. Seuss, “Do not cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”

Quite honestly, I feel both right now. I am crying. A lot. Yoga Flirt has been a miraculous time in my life. It taught me more lessons than we ever taught you. When the idea for the memory wall came up it opened a flood gate for me. Faces, laughter, tears, beauty, women in community, women discovering how strong and feminine they really are.

Truth be told, I am sad and disappointed that no one has yet risen to the challenge of Queen. To see this creation dormant makes me sad. I also trust in Divine timing and that maybe after a short break one or more women who believes so fully in the value and necessity of Yoga Flirt will want to invest her time and efforts to expand it out into the world.

And yet also I am proud, to have courageously created something unique, not to be found anywhere else on Earth. As Elizabeth Gilbert says, that’s Big Magic right there.

As Yoga Flirt slows and moves towards her last breath for now my heart is shattering into a thousand pieces. Each piece has a name on it. One of them is yours.

And also, I am smiling. I am ready and excited to move forward. I’m thrilled and overjoyed to teach private and small group yoga for women. (FYI I’m a kick-a** teacher and Spiritual leader, come take a free class! Ask me for a card.) I am at peace with what has unfolded. I trust there is a reason that right now Yoga Flirt will be tucked away. If they can bring back the X-Files after 13 years…never say never.

Together we practice non-attachment. When things “…come to you, let them come; enjoy their presence. But when they go, enjoy their departure, too. When them come, they come alone, so allow them to go alone without losing your mind along with the external object.” Start to learn who you are beyond the external, who you really are in your soul. You are more than a pole dancer, a Flirt Sister. I can’t tell you who you are. You must dive deep within and ask those questions.

It is from those askings that I have found my own answers. Teacher. Learner. Lover. So many ways to do each of these every day. It opens me to freedom. To teach in a way that stirs and ignites my creativity. To learn vast numbers of subjects. To show love in big ways and small.

What I know for sure: you do not want a leader who wants to be doing something else. I feel sad for your sadness. I honor and recognize your grief. The beauty of grief is that is shows how much we care and love. I see your grief and your gladness for me. You can feel more than one thing at a time, I do. What you feel is real and you should dive deep and allow the feelings to roll through you. Tears. Anger. Confusion. Discomfort at not knowing what’s next.

Maybe underneath that you can explore with me – Faith. Faith that something good will rise from the ashes of this end. The phoenix. A lotus. Out of mud, debris, great beauty and strength rise. The cycle of creation and destruction.

“Destruction is the doorway to positive change.” Have faith in the change.

If you enjoyed or were inspired by what you read, please comment below, Like, Share, Pin and Tweet. With Gratitude, Cathy MA. Ed, E-RYT500

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